29th February – To Propose Or Not To Propose?

Guest post by Sharon Stephens, the Central and East Herts Musical Minis franchisee.

On February 29th 2004 I proposed to my now husband Paul. I had been married before and knew that this time around this was really love. Not the stuff of fairytales, but almost! My love for Paul was deep and heartfelt, my heart skipped a beat when I saw it was him calling me on my mobile, or had sent me a text and I’d smile to myself whenever I thought of him. When we were together I felt safe and protected, but above all, truly loved. I was safe in the knowledge that Paul loved me, warts and all. We laughed together every day, about things that most people wouldn’t find funny, but that made them all the more amusing!

So (before you ask me to pass the sick bag!) I’ll tell you why, if our love was this wonderful and I was sure it was reciprocal, didn’t I wait for Paul to propose to me? Simple, Paul is one of life’s most laid back people, more laid back than anyone I have ever met in fact, the proverbial Mr Horizontal. It takes a huge amount of provocation to rile him and his unspoken motto in life is “if it ain’t broke, why fix it?” I knew that he would never propose to me in a million years, but I also knew that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with this man. I had lost my Mum to cancer two years and a day before meeting Paul – we always say she is my guardian angel and brought him to me – and I know that losing her had made me realise how precious and sometimes cruelly short life can be, so I decided that if I wanted to be with this man, it was up to me to make it happen!

As I’ve already mentioned, Paul and I laugh a lot and we don’t take things too seriously unless we have to, so I decided that I’d propose in a cheesy way. I went to a High Street chain and got him a cheap “engagement” ring, then stopped at the florists on the way home for a single red rose. I chose a card with a big red heart on – obviously left over from Valentine’s day! – and wrote on it “Marry Me?”. We lived in a flat at the time and I knew that Paul would stop in our bedroom on the way in to take off his suit and change, so I laid his ring, rose and card on his pillow! I waited in the living room and when he came in I sat with baited breath. I don’t care how self-assured you are, there is always that minute doubt in your mind that they’ll say no! I heard Paul laugh, but he didn’t come through “oh no!” I thought, “he thinks it’s a ridiculous idea, how embarrassing!” but he walked into the room grinning like a Cheshire cat and handed me the card, on which he’d written in tiny letters “YES!”

That was eight years ago today and I don’t regret it for one second! Last year I was made redundant from a job in the City. This in itself wasn’t as bad as it could have been, because for ten months I had spent more time commuting each day, than I had spent with our son, Monty. I had been wanting to work with children, specifically as a primary school teacher, ever since I could remember, but never had the courage or self-belief to go to university and get my degree. I had toyed with all sorts of ideas on how I could work with small children and Paul had tried to encourage me to go for it each time. But on the day that I was told my job was at risk, I went home and something made me remember Musical Minis, the fantastic music group Monty had done before I’d had to go back to work. I’d come home from those classes saying to Paul how I wished I could do that for a living. I play piano to grade 8 and love all kinds of music, so to combine that with a programme that aims to develop pre-schoolers and see just how brilliantly it works, was my idea of a perfect job.

Sadly for me, the franchise for my area was already taken and I went back to being a PA and forgot all about it. Until the day I found out I was being made redundant. Something made me look at the Musical Minis website and there it was on the home page “Hertford Franchise for Sale”. I remember feeling excited and giddy and emailing Karen and the former franchisee for more details. It seemed that fate was lending a hand, or perhaps my guardian angel was guiding me again as she had on the night I met Paul. To cut a long story short, after several meetings and discussions and most importantly, with total and unflinching support from Paul, last September I became the proud new owner of the Hertford franchise of Musical Minis – which I have since renamed Central & East Herts.

Proposing to Paul was one of the best decisions of my life, alongside moving in with him and having his child! In Paul I have the most wonderful, supportive husband and best friend. With his help I’m doing a job I love, that allows me to spend so much more time with Monty. On the 9th March, we will have been together ten years, on 8th July we will have been married seven years and on Boxing Day our son, Monty, will be three years old.

So, if the question is “To Propose, or not to Propose” I’d have to say, the answer is a resounding “Yes”!

Comments

[Cathie]

What a lovely story Sharon and a gorgeous picture. Saw my friend today who is living with her boyfriend and couldn't resist asking if she had any plans for the day! Sadly not - maybe I'll tell her to read your story. It was nice to hear how fate brought you to Musical Minis and that it is going really well for you.

[Sharon]

Thanks Cathie :o)

[Debbie Caygill]

Brought a tear to my eyes lovely story, thanks for sharing! My husband and I have been together since I was 16, coming in for 17 years now! He proposed when I was 19! I am not a morning person & he would come to my mums on a Saturday & I was always still in bed! This one day he was helping me dry my hair & I noticed something in his pocket! Being the nosey person I am I insisted on finding out what it was! He made me close my eyes & I when I opened them he was down on 1 knee! Not at all what he planned or I imagined but 17 years later & coming upto 12 years of marriage it doesn't matter how we got here, we're still together & that's the main thing!