I THINK I must be a terrible Mum because I'm really dreading the Easter holidays. This weekend both my boys return from University for Easter and will disrupt the home life I've now become used to. As a Mum I'm expected to be eagerly awaiting their return with open arms - longing for the opportunity to cook, clean and wash for them. All it does is fill me with dread!
Matthew, my eldest, is now in his final year so has just one term left to go before he faces the world. He is only home for 2 weeks as he has a dissertation to hand in by the end of April. In his first year at University I couldn't wait for him to come home. Oh how things have changed. His term actually finished last week but he stayed at University to use the library. He'll now come back with his books for a while then go back to finish off the dissertation in the library. Until this term I have seen Matthew at least once each term - sometimes more. We usually go up to visit him and he sometimes comes down to see us.
Every year at Matthews University they have a Parents Day. We went in his first 2 years and thoroughly enjoyed the whole experience. This year he gave us the date but said it was booked - he delayed signing up for it despite my constant asking. We said we would just come up to visit anyway but he made it very clear we were unwelcome and he was too busy. Obviously, this really hurt. Most of our problems I think stem from the fact he has a girlfriend who, despite really trying, we just don't get on with. This has caused an understandable strain in our relationship.
Rob is going to collect him tomorrow. Matthew is surprised that I'm not going too but I feel I just can't be bothered to go. I would have loved to go for Parents Day or even another day to visit him but he didn't want us to - why should I run now that he says come? He wants me to drive him back straight after Easter but I'm not prepared to commit to that either. I really don't want to end up as one of those Mums who does everything for their children but their children don't even realise, appreciate or acknowledge it.
Now onto Alex, my middle child. As I've mentioned in previous posts, Alex has just started at University this year and had difficulty finding his feet. This term he has been much happier, largely due to the fact he has become our weekend house guest. He decided to come home every weekend and in doing so has found he is really enjoying his weeks at University. Every Friday he comes home with his washing! Not being a prize mug he does have to do it himself though! On Sundays when he returns back to University our home life settles down again. Now he is coming home for a month.
Emily, my youngest is still at home. She finds it hard to adapt every weekend when Alex is home. The two of them bicker about the radio, tv etc. Now with both her brothers coming home she is already upset that she will have no say in what she watches, listens to or eats. She knows the fridge will have no food in it when she goes to take something for her lunch!
I'm not looking forward to, in fact dreading, the strained relationship with Matthew, the bickering between all 3 kids, the constant shopping and washing, the mess, the constant tv, playstation and most of all the disruption to my everyday life.
I am looking forward to all my family being together - well I think I am! An open house for the boys friends - it's lovely to see their pre University friends again.
I do want to have the boys back for the holidays but I'm also dreading the conflicts that this will bring to our family as a whole. I must be a dreadful Mum wishing that the term was just a few months longer.
Photo by Flickr krisdecurtis